Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
