every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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