If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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