her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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