My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
A+ Viking dick
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