Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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