bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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