I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
