Small penises have feelings too.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
