Dual....:-)
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Randomize
