Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
