yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
