my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
