he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize