is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Randomize
