We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
