I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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