good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
