First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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