whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he told me I talked like a deaf person
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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