you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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