What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
