She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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