He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
