My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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