Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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