This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
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