is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
The struggles of a small town man whore
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
