That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
