I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
