He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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