i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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