I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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