Farmville is her only friend.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
