how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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