I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
