And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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