maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize