Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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