discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
