i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
