Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
