How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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