And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
