yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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