it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
