No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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