i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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