so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
