I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
