it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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