i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
They took my balls.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
