You don't have asthma, your pregnant
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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